First Week of Holiday

Fuh...lots happened last week. I attended a boot camp and comic fiesta. I'll report on the comic fiesta things first XD.

I took 9 sleepless days and nights to complete this costume. What was I thinking? I was thinking that I'm getting really old soon so it's now or never! My first attempt: Yuuko Ichihara. I loved her as much as Quistis Trepe! We shared lots in common....trust me. *Evil grin*

Do I know sewing? Yeah, sew table cloth thanks to Kemahiran Hidup Tingkatan 2. My cousin sister, Sera is the real tailor. Before she left for Englang two years ago, she made me a Kimono (her first attempt on japanese traditional wear). She taught me how to take measurement and chucked me her first tayloring book. With the guidance of this two items and of course, the Yuko picture I keep staring into the past few weeks, I've managed to pull off with it! Hehe...it wasn't great but it didn't fall off, I guess. Haha!

The moment I hit the Sunway shopping, you should see the people's face. Everyone stopped and point. "The hell is that?" "Mom...". "Check out that vodoo chick man..." Anyway, it felt at home again when I reached the Conventional Centre because there are many other cosplayers! It was awesome that people recognize me as Yuko *hidung mengembang* from XXXHolic and requested for pictures. Hehe....terasa macam bintang pulak dah! *hidung continue mengembang*.

The best part was I had an almost complete group for this series, Ame Warashi, Zarashi Warashi and Watanuki. It will be great to have Domeki...heh! It was fun la despite all the unhappy things that had been happening around me. More pics in facebook Comic Fiesta 2009 album.

Will this be my last cosplay? I dun think so cuz I'm addicted! I'm already starting on my next project: Jigoku Shoujo. Okok...I know. I know. I'm always taking all those dark characters. Hmmm...maybe if I'm crazy enough, I'll do something totally opposite. Chobit maybe. Lol.

A special person I had to thanks for making all this possible is Siew Li a.k.a Kikuzakura who helped me to gather my materials and inspired to cosplay. Thanks, gal! You helped me to get around these things! Hugs~

Also to Kin Man and Kelvin who accompanied me throughout the comic fiesta so I feel less alien. Thanks! Thanks for giving me the courage to sign up the solo competition...haha.

I've met many cool people there, Yurei Chan, Emily, a yellow chobit, the Naruto guy (sorry didn't catch your name) and Yukito (thanks for helping me on stage!). It has been fun people, keep in touch yah! Also thanks to the photographers who tag my pictures. Many thanks!

Atarashii no Tsuki (New Moon)

Hmm...I just got back from Seremban. It was a happy, the last day is always the happiest day. Even when SN or Dr throw mean stuff at me, I simply can't perceive any of them XD.

Anyway, I went to Mines intentionlly to fix both my handphones which decided to expire at the same time. Argh! Then I unintentionally bought myself a CSL handphone XD. So far so good but since it's made here, I'll make noise if any problem arise within six months.

Okay, down to business. I actually watch this Twilight thingy in the cinema. Let me confess, I was absolutely totally uninterested when the first movie came out. I mean, Venus watching romantic movie??? That's like having Bee Ann going to casino. So why I pay bucks to watch this new moon thingy in cinema? It's Jacob! It's him! It's him! Argh! So this post is going to be totally bias, I admit.

Now, now. We all know girls go drooling over this Edward guy (the all good non harmful vampire). I think he looked like drug addict...I feel an angry mob approaching. Hide!

So...I went online to check out these hot babes from two different world. Finger crossed...I really tried my best to put up the best pic of Edward. Really. So, who wins? We all have that to ourselves, eh.

Sigh...at the end of the day, don't we just hate Bella for being 'torn' between two absolutely pretty hunk (for me just one le...). On top of that, she used Jacob as a temporary replacement! Woo...I hate pretty girls. Grr...ruff!How could anyone bring themselves to mistreat Jacob Black!? Argh!

Definition of Cute

I saw these while browsing through some online products. Beh tahan, must blog about these pictures.

Cute, aren't they? Huh guys? come on.

Yeah, okay. cool. so we should ALL puff up our cheeks when we take pictures, eh? Head down and peep up like kena sawan. Then go , "Rahhh!! I'm a kitty cat. Miawh!" *Slap forehead* I must be very 'soi' from blogging about this XS

Cosplay

I remember a few weeks before SPM I was talking like crazy about Comic Fiesta. I saw some cosplayer before and I wanted to go as one too. Going there in normal attire is simply abnormal xp. Anyway. I wanted to go as Quistis back then because I loved her very much, her personality and charm. Heh...what I didn't know was how much time and dime cosplaying cost. My neck. It has been five years since then. I went to CF last year as the lady in Van Helsing. Okay...I know it's totally not Japanese but heck, I have nothing else to wear. This year, I've made Jam Kuradoberi's (Guilty Gear X) attire for GACC initially but only 70% completed. I gave up on the shoes and hair. I'm still hunting for materials now. Hopefully can come up with something neat end of this year o.O Here are some of the beautiful cosplayers I find successfully portray the characters.

Tifa Final Fantasy 7. One of the most cosplayed female character. Replaced Rinoa long time.

Sailor Saturn. It's very rare to have nice Sailormoon series cosplayer. They are usually as below...

Sigh...wish Sailor Venus was slimmer.

Love Quistis. Love it. Love it! Argh...that killer look! Stupid Squall.

Dunno what they are but nice!

Uugh...one of my favourite! Genzo Sanzo and the Saiyuki Boys~

This one looks a bit sad. I think it's from Bleach.

Another version of Tifa. She rocks!

One secret for cosplaying: If you have nice costume but not so nice look, this shall be your signature pose.

Kakashi after one year didn't exercise. Daily burger meals.

I'll cry if I see this. "Am I in the game? Wohoo! Gimme mah weapon!"

Neck itchy. Cheap body paint is like that.

Naruto~

Chobit? Dunno but lovely~

Flashing Lights

In Your Shadow

You got your name in lights
But they can't seem to spell mine right
You sold a mil today
Today I'm lucky if I get paid
If I could get paid
I'd survive another day
Maybe if I could get played
They'd know my name
Your girls are fine it seems
A dime or two in every dozen
I only wanted one but I'm no one
So I get nothing
But all this nothing I've got
Is all that's keeping me tough
Maybe this thing I've got is enough

When I'm alone and the lights go off
I'm never sure if I can make it that far
All that I know isI want thoseI want those
I want those flashing lights...

You dropped the class re-wrote the booksand
I'm still trying to pass
I'm at the back, professor, a question
What is the secret to these (flashing lights)
Is it just make believe
It's not easy
Wish it as ABC
You did your time
You broke your wire
And now you got your shine
I'm in the line
Lost in the crowd
Still trying to figure it out
Still trying to do it right
Still trying to find the light
Maybe not tonight

Colin Munroe is a genius for writing these lines.

Yin & Yang

YIN & YANG

She cooks. I read books. She does house chores and I’m lazy hardcore. She is sensitive and caring whilst me, hypersensitive and daring. While all guys love her, I drool over poster of Keanu Reeves and Vin Diesel. While she learns how to cook, I busy myself youtubing. I facebook like crazy while she does her reading for assignments. She spent sleepless night doing her assignment and I? 5 minutes each day. She is loved by all but me? Hah. I have scrolls of people who hate my sinovial fluid. She whispers prayer at night while I sing like donkey in the bathroom. She walked with confident in wards and delivered care conscientiously. Me? I tap my foot, recalling the steps I’ve learnt from youtube while pasing reports. She is the sample must-be-nurse for IMU and I’m the wild goose who dares to raise my voice to banana doctors and coconut nurses. While she dreams to be a professional benchmark nurse, I wished I’ve done another course. She just wants to find a good man and settle down with a cozy family. I HATE CHILDREN. She plays volleyball and the center for netball. The only thing I knew was to run like crazy but guess what? My stamina is zero now. Z.E.R.O.

We used to talk but after the incident last year, we hardly talk. Not even when we went to the trip together. Not even when the whole house is empty except both of us. Not even if we get stuck in the lift. Lol…I am notorious for silence treatment. That’s my middle name. No, wait. Mean is my middle name. Or is it Snob? Gee…can’t remember, too many middle names.

Today she cooked some herbal chicken for me cuz I slept like pig and didn’t go out for dinner. Knowing me, I’ll probably end up with a bowl of instant noodles. That must be the healthiest thing I’ve ever taken for the past six months. Hmm…I’m ashamed and don’t know how to thank you so I dedicate this post to you. I don’t think she reads blog because she rather read journals so…sigh! I have so little guts after all. Sigh…I envy her for all that she can do and the fact that everybody knows her and love her. I feel like a pig. Wait…that’s animal abuse. I feel like a can of spilt corn.
I really should be studying instead of blogging nowadays as exam is approaching but heck, I can’t concentrate in those slides anyway.

This Is It

I watched 'This Is It' yesterday night. It was...difficult to accept that a legend has died. I'm sure many out there think this is rubbish but he is a legend, not Will smith. He is the beginning of an amazing entertainment, accomplished things that no entertainer now can ever achieved. I must admit I've forgotten about him for a while, forgot about my childhood idol. While the classy girls in my class worshiped Mariah Carey and Whitney Houston, I loved his dance so much and wished I can dance too. Nobody dance the way he does because he moves the music.

In the clip, he looked frail and obviously sick but he never lose his lush. His love and knowledge for dance and music never fade one inch. It is hard to work with people who know what they want and MJackson knew what he wanted. He is a perfectionist when it comes to music. He wrote things that touched lives but totally ignored because we go for the hip and the hop nowdays, the hot and bootylicious.

Hmm...whatever I say makes no difference now because he is dead. People say good thing about dead people. They remember the good deeds and say nice stuff during burial ceremony. I guess I'm doing the same now. Something good is taken from the world just as Leslie Cheung did. Just one thing, nobody can replace him. Especially not Kenya West. MJ will lived through his music just as Elvis did to our older generation. Sigh...the new generation will not appreciate him like those who grew up humming his songs and trying to do the moonwalk thing. Miss him.

Paediatric Ward

One week is all it takes to kill me but I still have two more weeks with these living thing we call 'children'. That means by the end of two weeks, I'll be worse than dead. I dread vital signs soooo much. I just have to walk near them and they will start screaming. Putting the thermometer under their arms was like stabbing them continuously with a jagged edge dagger. Taking their blood pressure is as if I'm breaking their bones and crushing their flesh. So what do I do after vital signs as 9am? Nothing. You want me to go talk to them? Play with them? Please...I just want the ward to be quiet until the next vital signs.

What's the most upsetting event? Parent thinking I'm tormenting her precious 11th child. I'm like...gimme a break. I'm just doing what I'm supposed to do. I'm not going to be gentle and gugu gaga with your child when she's all violent and abusive. Medication has to be administered. Then? Tak payah give? Who's gonna give? Doctors? Right. You slowly wait la. Then ask why can't discharge home, why haven't recover, why this why that. Yee...over protective parents make me...what's the word? Loya. Yeah, that's the word. This is one heck of a ward I find tougher than psychiatric ward. Children...argh!!!

What is my consolation? The gay doctor is in my ward! Yay! I was thrilled to see his oily hair after a year until I realize he is gay no more. Hmm...people changed huh? He is more funny when he's gay. Lol...no names here. Another interesting thing is to watch a lady administering asthma puff to her baby with a chamber. The 6 month old child lying oblivious on the soft bed. The lady jab the chamber abruptly onto her tiny face, sent her frail body sinking into the bed. Her tiny hands were all over the place. Lol...

Beyonce vs Taylor

Comparing this two person is like comparing:
1. Britney Spears to Jewel
2. Justin Timberlake to Nick Carter
3. Ning Baizura to Kris Dayanti
4. Tyra Banks to Ophrah
5. DBSK to 5566/F4

There will be various opinions about each of the pairs but one thing is, you simply cannot compare them as they have total different set of parameters.
Beyonce is:
1. Hot, sexy and daring.
2. Experienced.
3. Singer, dancer and actres.
4. A Pop Queen with R&B background.

Taylor is:
1. Country, sweet and decent.
2. Guitarist.
3. Fairy tale princess.
3. Country song singer.

Now, come to the best music video award. Both sucks. Beyonce's 'Single Ladies' is impressive with the cheeky dance moves but for the whole 3 mins song? That's a bit boring. Taylor? Darling Taylor has nothing new to show. If you guys remember the once Pop Queen Anvril, she had the same concept in 'Girlfriend'. So, that's plain boring. The cheerleading part is also very fake. I guess she won the heart of America with her preety white face, gentle curls that fall on her cherry cheeks and sharp chin. All I can remember from her is beautiful dresses that I'd love to have but first, I'll need a room of closet for them.

I don't have anything against them. Neither of them is my favourite. I liked Beyonce for her 'If I were A Boy' and I had Taylor's 'Love Story' for ringtone over the past few months. It's the award system which messed up the category. Both have their strength in different way.

Next, we discuss about Kenya West and his deed. Lots of people already condemned him for the 'deadly' sin he committed unto darling Taylor but that's that. It's done and Beyonce covered it well. Beyonce's attire is weird, by the way. I just wonder how Jay-Z felt when the hero went up stage to back-up his wife. Hmm...anyway. I thought what he did was not appropriate since he is nominated the new King of Pop as Michael Jackson never ditch another entertainer in his life. He could have voice out his opinion gently over the media after the show or something. Nonetheless, after reading all the dirty words thrown at him from Taylor's fan boys (young little boys who go gugu gaga over her physical), I think that's even. XP

Wishes

The more I read, the more I found out things which hurt. No matter how much I tried to cheer myself up, it just doesn't work. After all the efort I've put into this, I've got criticised in the end. Not good enough, they said. Too bitchy they complained. They want to be sexy, fun, all play and no hard work. What a mistake I've done. As much as they wished they had another captain, I wished I had another set of people who joined it purely for genuine interest. I was let me down like shit but still some stood higher to spat back at me. What luck I have since sem one. I should have let you all think about the routine, songs and outfit. Let you guys handle everything yourself. Yeah, then perhaps you all can do better and maybe beat the champion. After all, I'm not a cheerleader nor a gymnast or dancer. Who the hell is she? Just a nursing student but what does that make you? A preety face. This is a game for tough people, not like what you watch in movies.

Sometimes I wished I had my old team back. The team who knew me for years since secondary school and understood the need for perfection on stage. The team who knew how hard I push for the sake of the team. The team who knew I divide well between work and play. They all left, now all over the world. Once again, leaving me behind this cow dung place.

So, the hours spent on youtubing, music hunting, practices and money wasted on contacting people who never bother to reply, I'll just have to take it that I've been silly, down right idiot. Another thing which pissed me off was her lies. I was empathetic to her situation and tried to cheer her up until I found out her lies and scheme. It was pure disgusting. The worst part, it was a person who speak of God's love. Speechless.

Defeated

Let's see what we've got from IMU Cup cheer 2009:
1. Bruises esp the flyers and bases.
2. One sore eye.
3. An extra uniform thanks to some mean joke.
4. Seven pairs of poms poms, flash cards, and several huge flags to congest Beh's house.
5. Four months of practice, headache and heart ache.
6. Several trip back from Seremban on weekdays and this last one from Perak.
7. Threats from Nursing Department when I request for leave on Friday.
8. Spenditure over RM500 including petrol, tol and gadgets.
9. Hoarseness of voice and sore throat for all the cheer.
10. A bruised and sore vetebra and sacrum.
11. Several trips back to Aunt Connie's to mend the uniforms.
12. Various misunderstnading and personal issues which affects the team in the end.

Let's see the Genesis of Taurus cheer:
1. One stupid girl too free, spent her last semester break to get a cheer team together.
2. Sven people came together - Fion, Beh, Wei Wen, Kwong Howe, Arthur, Jason and I.
3. One outfit issue misunderstnading over the phone, I lose Arthur. Esther didn't even join.
4. This girl spent sleepless night finding songs, designing outfit and choreographing routine.
5. Headache that after two months, only 11 people showed up although we need 15 to get in.
6. All M207 studs who knew me since sem 1 pulled out cuz they think I'll make a lousy captain.
7. After that, we began to force people to come in and make a number of twenty. Fine with me.
8. People come and go. Zach left but at least he was responsible enough to let me know his issue.
9. One flyer betrayed the whole team and left two weeks before the competition.
10. Thank God for Christine who is much more capable to replace her.
11. Loon Wei replaced Zach. They both learn fast.
12. Throughout four months, only four practices have full attendance for less than 6 hours.
13. In the end, a group of people with no cheer, gymnastic nor dance background came together.
14. Did we rock the stage? We earned equal compliments from the crowd but we could have done better, I guess. At least, I could.

When the results were out, millions of questions flood in. Could it been better if I don't lead? Could it been better if Esther take over? Imagine shit like Arthur, Zach, Ester and Wendy didn't leave the team. We will have a team of 24 - 4 cheerleaders, four flyers, and an extra base. As a conclusion, shit happens. The worst part is the less than 24hours notice that we need tumblings as the CHARM people wanna judge it. I felt that Taurus is constantly being bullied because of me. I'm no cheerleader, no great dancers nor a beauty queen. Just a nursing students who's constantly absent for postings. I can't be there to protect nor defend our rights. That's why I blamed myself despite all. Another worst thing is that despite all I've done, I can't earn the respect from some of my team mate. That's one shit too. Fail to incorporate dicipline in the team.

Nevertheless, put aside all the shit: I've got a handful of people who is committed and made the team much more cheerful. Grace has been very hardworking and made most of the props. Cady has been a responsible treasurer for the team and I have no worries about financial issues...erm...except maybe the input from the house. Fion and Jason lead well when I'm not around. I've got two other flyers who is ever willing to try out all shit xp - Kelly and Grace. I've got the most stable bases ever and hot too according to some reliable sources- Beh and Wei Wen. I've also got Kwong Howe and those mentioned who rarely skip any practice. It's always the same face which showed up. Lol...Ivana and her playful charm, Alex, Jones and Chiu Hong who managed the stunts. My tango parthner, Loon Wei who is sooooooooooooooo tall. Wai Peng who joined despite her crazy schedule. Tracy and Christine who danced well for the team.

Lastly but not least, I went home injured and wounded. Heartbroken and shattered but in the end, I still have Kin Man by my side. The fella who kena countless scolding from me. The guy who cared so much and take me from wherever I am for practices. The guy who had to sleep at... and pee at... . Love you all in different way. Hope you all have enjoyed the team and kep in touch with one another. This is the climb we went through and it's a period passed that cannot be repeated. Unless...Monday, 6pm sharp at 4th floor. Sharp ar...sport attire!

Football

This comment came from a girl's eyes. She is no big fan of football but she does observe certain match especially the World Cup. She supports whoever against MU and enjoyed Korea's game. Looking forward for the coming World Cup but dunno which group to support yet - definitely not German, Brazil or England. Here goes:

When a team scored a goal, we say the team has good attackers including goalie. Goaler's picture always on the front page (or the back page as the matter of fact). However, when a team lose...there are a few theory (or people to blame).

a) If the ball is always on their court but for a short while before a goal, the defenders sucks.

b) If the ball rarely enters the court and yet they lose a goal, the keeper sucks.

c) If the ball is always at their court but for a long time, the goal keeper sucks.

d) If the team always get yellow card, there's a few more theory:

i) The winning team have good actors who fooled camera at times (The Nigerian team don't play such ;-)

ii) The yellow card team is over agressive, kiasu tak kiasi.

iii) The refree don't like your face.

iv) You got face problem.

Into the Secret Garden

I just read one of my friend's blog. I admire the way she put her thoughts together. The way she danced with her ideas and gave a deep presentation. I felt the most for the content because I know many people out there including me, felt that way and did the same silly mistakes before.

The essence of falling in love is so suffocating. You know how you first knew that person and how you slowly found out more things about him, most of the time on purpose *winks*. The first actual conversation, the teaseful remarks, the time spent together (mainly on work purposes). Then you realise you will purposely find things to do and spend time with him (join the same activity, same club et cetera). Every single sms or phone call means a lot. There will be messages that you will keep for months! Like the song 'Teardrops on Guitar', everything fades when he is around. He began to infiltrate your thoughts everywhere - breakfast, lecture, toilet, before you sleep and the first thing when you wake up. The more you found out the more you want to know deeper but sometimes, the deeper you go the more you get hurt. If it worked out, it's called a relationship. If it did not, it's called crush.

Too often, we fall in love with people who don't 'fall' back. We comfort ourself by saying it is the process of finding the right one. It's even more depressing if we fall for people who don't even know our existence. It's kind of rare to fall for someone who likes back *hugging sotong*. Unless we're talking about a super hot chick or a super hot hunk that everybody wants - you know that kind of people we always say they can get anyone they want? Hmm...I wonder how these people feel. Do they get rejected as well? Sometimes it's not even wise to fall too fast cuz you're might lose the things you hold dearly. Many a times, people judge with heart when it comes to this matter, all the palpitations.

I guess the best way is to maintain friendship if things doesn't work out from the BEGINNING. Don't wait till tears come flowing and hearts get broken. Pulling a break that time can't save a beautiful friendship. Nevetheless, like the song 'Realize': If you just realise what I just realise, we'll never have to wonder if we missed out on each other now. Meaning: maybe not now but some time in future. Just a maybe though so it's okay to maintain a friendship right, isn't it? Be strong, girl. This is dedicated to you. Hugs! A survival guide to those in relationship, you just gotta keep falling in love but with the same person ;-) *hugs sotong*.

Question to ponder: Why fat guys can find girlfriend but fat girls difficult to find boyfriend? Statistically saying.

End of a Glorious Titan

I signed in friendster a while ago. I was running through a few things and realise that I signed up friendster in 2004. Back then, friendster was the IN thing. Friendster was EVERYTHING. Something like HI 5 came up but didn't make it. Friendster was with me throughout my secondary school life. Today, it's all about Facebook and the era of Friendster ended.

I read back some of the testimony from my friends. Those days, it is very popular to attach teddy bears and christmas trees in the testimony column. Every year without fail, the testimony column will be flooded with new year wish, birthday wishes and christmas greetings. I regret that I did not really keep in touch with most of them. Sigh...I wasn't that much of a friend back then, I guess.

Then there was this blog, my first ever blog. I compared my writing nowdays and I just can't write like the way I used to. Through the blog I remember my birthday parties where I literally forced people to attend xs. I remember being part of the choir team in church, dances and come up with short sketches for annual celebrations. Hmmm...I used to join art stuff back in school where I started to mix with account clas students. I remember doing a painting which one of my classmate liked a lot. Now I look at that painting also I want to vomit.

I used to be anime freak too. I may be a japanese freak now but no longer anime freak. My era ended with Gensomaden Saiyuki. Hmm...I once forced a guy to draw Genzo Sanzo for me. Hehe...you see, I used to force a lot of people do a lot of thing. Lol...I wondered how I did it. Sorry ah people! Ngo zhi cho le...

Surprisingly there are still people who use friendster. They told me friendster is more personal, quiet and suitable for close friends. Hmm...true also, facebook is so popular until it is no longer personal and there's no touch of privacy anymore. But I like Restaurant City and Suki no Sushi!

Love Your What!?

Love your enemy. Sweat...when my enemy appears before my eyes, me heart rate increase, blood pressure shoot up, heavy diaphoresis, stop saliva production and reduced gastraointestinal tract mortility. As a result, look away instantly and pretend didn't see anything. If I have to meet enemies daily, I would suffer, cardiovascular disease, hypertension, dehydration and constipation.

What is going on?

As usual, I like to break things down for clearer picture. What brings that kind of hatred is actually the work of our real enemy - the saitans. They came, after all to kill, steal and destroy. The only thing they fear and cannot comprehen is love. I guess that is why we are called to love. Of course, I'm saying this from the Christians' point of view. However, it is SOOOOOOO hard to do!

Take the example today. I walked pass a guy who put me down greatly a short while ago. I said 'hi' and gave a genuine smile. It's genuine okay because I hope he would forget the grudge and be friends again. Mana la tahu, he look also don't want to look at me. So...I'm suffering in silence and it's good cuz that will bring us back to the post 'Weapon of Christ' - why we need to suffer. Woo...sakit hati. Then again, everyday also we will meet some dunggu fella who scratch our ego a bit here and there and pour buckets of ice at us. Still, we can choose to think of the nice people we meet even if it means your pet cat when you get back. Sigh...in the end, it's about about self-awareness and self-control. I'm still learning.

Oh...also, the previous post is not directed to anyone in particular. Lol...my boyfriend got so tension and thought I was tembak-ing him for no reason. Nola, macha. Please read the post intro. If you naughty, I'll run you over with a truck and reverse. Run over and reverse. Run over and reverse and run over...xp.

Sex before marriage

I wrote about this before some time last year. Recently, I've heard another incident which prompted me to write again. Hey, I'm not being nosy. I'm just voicing out my opinion. Lady Gaga is right when she says, 'The story always begin with a boy and a girl and a *sex* and a *game*. Take note, it's only a game not relationship.

Sigh...where do I begin? Temptations are great when two young lovers get together. The lights were dim, soft background music, nobody else is around, some sweet talk and oops! One moment you're talking about the future and the next, 'Oh my God! What have I done?' You see, a guy can almost instantly feel guilty and regret after orgasm. He will feel so bad about himself for doing so and so. Thinking that he doesn not deserve her and that she deserves better. As a defence mechanism stated by Freud's Theory, he left the girl. There's an obvious misconception here. The guy thinks he's being noble by backing off (not wanting to hurt her again la et cetera) but it's plain irresponsible and selfish.

For those who opt for fun and play then I have nothing to say la except that sexually transmitted diseases are no fun and that condoms are not 100% safe. But to those who seek future and a healthy relationship, draw a line and have respect for one another. Besides, there are other ways of showing affections. It's worth the wait. Why cannot wait? Scare see the actual body dy regret terus!? So what does your relationship based on?

Hmm...I don't know why. I think once it starts, it just won't stop. That's when promiscuisity (did I get the spelling right? I lazy to check) starts. Unless of course it was a forced act. What do you think? I'm not saying all but many relationship ended after it starts. Well you may argue there are relationships which ends without sex. Yeah, so which sounds better? Break up without prio body involvement or after? I'm not asking the guys. Girls?

For the girls, don't be so trusting. Men (guys and gals) can speak wonders and promised miracles but sadly...sometimes words are just worlds. So let's all not be stupid ya. Girls, protect thy value and guys don't ruin your future and name.

Moral lessons:

1. Think twice. Guys and girls alike. Think more than twice.

2. Self-help.

3. Get away before things get out of hand.

Okay, sorry if this post is disturbing for some of you but this is an issue. Like it or not, you might be in the same dilemma one day. Okay, okay! I shaddap now.

Weapon of Christ

When it comes to Christians, the immediate symbol would be the cross. Do you know what does the cross means? The cross is the sign of suffering as Christ suffered on it for the people He loved.

Christian weapon = cross

Since the Cross = suffering

Therefore one of Christians' greatest weapon = ability to suffer as Christ did

I'm not saying that type of suffering where you need to be stripped and whipped. Criticism, betrayal and misunderstood by others for being a Christain is a form of suffering too. That kind of loneliness and silent persecution, painful it is. What I'm trying to say??

The world is with sin and darkness. When you try to shine His light, shadows will try to devour you. Because the darkness is greater in this world, the light within you often put to shame and rediculed. Do you still stand as the light and allow Him to shine through you? Or do you allow it to dim and blend into the darkness.

Persecution is too common even among Christians. Going to church every Sunday doens't make you a Christian. Christian means being Christ-like. So what's that? Not asking you to be god but to love like the way he did. Don't you agree if the world has more love and less lust, hatred and greed things would have been better?

God's love (Agape): Allowing freedome and choice to grow. Allowing suffering of the consequences so you can learn repentance but never to leave your side and let you fall. Never keep grudge but to forgive and nurture. Understands your weakness and finds your strength.

KLPF 2009

This event is all about photography for photography lovers (pro and amateur photographers alike). Fujifilm held a photography competition entitled 'People'. Therefore, four other girls and I went on stage and posed what seemed like forever on stage to be 'shoot'. The flashlights we unbearable. I've got migraine at the end of the day...

On Sat, we were supposed to wear guy-like attire. 'Cool' stuff they said. So I had this no-smile-ans no-nonsense-look all the way through. Mana tau ada people complain this model didn't smile enough. Cis...I abide by the given theme ma. There was supposed to be a second attire but nobody told me about the casual wear so I ended up going on stage with my aunty baju and uncle pants. Lol...

The other girls were Eva, Rhea and Careen. I didn't catch the name of the other taller girl XS. Sumimasen.

From left: Pierre (I tembak the spelling), stage coordinator. That name reminded me of the first ballet barre I had. Lol...was supposed to name it Abu though XD. Mei and I.

I totally love the make up! Mei was the make-up artist. There's three 'Mei' make-up artist in my life already o.O. She so tall and pretty than many of us there. I think she should be the one on stage though. Besides, many photographers took her pics than ours that day. Lol. Nevertheless, the hair was horrible. No fingers pointing, I'm not telling who did it but it was a...well...I give you the liberty to comment.

One of da pic taken using a digital camera in the mist of all the hyperextended digital SLRs. I loved it though. Courtesy of my boyfriend who accompanied me there for two days! Thanks, gula-gula. Hugs!

Second day was better. I like my dresses and the body art. The hairdo was a whole lot better too. What a relief! Thank you guys for tagging me in FB yah! Hmmm...actually what I didn't know was the fact that I had to pose with Fuji Camera which felt like some sort of product launching. It was awkward. Posing with a camera xs. I seriously ran out of ideas on how to pose at the end of the day. Sigh...maybe I should just stick to fashion~

Well...the best thing is at the end of the day, I get to go home and curled up on my cozy bed with my kittens (10 cents and 5 cents). At night have dinner with my family and Man Man. Love you all~

Cheerleading

Something upsetting happened lately. This year we had a new group of people for sport team. I was totally thrilled as I wasn't very happy with the team I had two years back because of the lack of commitment. This year, the cheerleading thing started off fine. Then there's this this miscommunication with this girl who later turned out to be a misunderstanding. She has no intention to join anyhow but because of this incident, one of my team mate left too. It's so heart wrenching because I really love this team as it is now. Each and everyone of them.

The fella who left told me to chill and relax. It's not like that. I just couldn't articulate how I felt about the team and I felt responsible to keep this team together. Then he told me don't put all the blame on myself. I'm not blaming myself of course since I'm not the one who messed up the team then pull my team mates away. What I felt was the responsibility to keep the team together if this can be done. Sometimes I just wondered how such women can have everything they want. How unfair things are. Sigh...broken hearted.

Heart wrenching. Totally. How such stupid thing cost a friendship and the spirit of the team. I've done what I can but it's still up to him in the end. I just hope things could turn out better.

Bon Odori

Yay! One of my 2009-must-do thing is achieved! I went to Bon Odori last Sat. It was supposed to be our club thing but as usual, I ended up organizing the whole thing and marfan friends around me who has nothing to do with the club. Anyway...it was worth the hussle so yeah, I'm so glad I went! Thanks for fetching us, Kelvin Hii!

Three juniors went with I - Yee Jin, Xiao Jie and Yen Lu. Met Kenneth and Sin Yee there too. The gate opens at five but when we reach there at 5:15pm, the place was half packed full! Food was good and unique. I wore my blue yukatta which I regreted the moment I walk out from my house. Nevertheless, I kind of thankful for wearing it during the dance. Some fellas thought I was Japanese and tried to sell me stuffs at higher price. Benci tul...some people made fun of the dance too. Benci tul...

The hightlight of the night were the dance and the drum performance. The steps are simple and repetative. I guess it was the atmosphere that everyone moved together which gave it the uniqueness and grand feeling. Imagine, thousand over people moving at the same time in a circular dance around the stage. Hmm....can't explain further. You've just gotta be there to feel it. I've uploaded some videos too. More pics can be obtain from facebook!