Sunday, September 12, 2010

My Shinjuku Incident

Haha...came across something funny while walking on the streets one afternoon. In Tokyo, you can see human jam rather than traffic jams. Pendestrians flood Tokyo streets along with those who cycles. It sure is a back itching thing to see guys in formal wear cycling a mountain bike to work. Anyway, what happened to me was...

I was walking like a zombie on the streets because I hadn't anough sleep (imagine the beginning of Resident Evil 4 movie with a girl in the middle of the street). Erm...minus the cheeky outfit. I was wearing jeans and a blue top, ready to paint Disneyland red. I gues what I wore wasn't what a girl in Tokyo normally wear. I noticed that females in Tokyo are mainly divided into four types:

1. Gothic Lolita (floods Harajuku, occasionally some comic stores), platforms, piercings, pink real hair, punk type. These are girls tourists look at and snap a few pictures. A minor division are those pinkish lolita or maid costume so famous in Akibahara (maid cafe). Girls in sexy maid costume will give out flyers. Pervert.

2. Barbie Dolls (I mean really barbie dolls with extensive hair, HUGE eyes, crazy lashes and oily lips, small hand bags and heels that kills). I don't want to see a Kent Doll. They appear anywhere at random where even Japanese can't help but to look.



3. School uniform. Need I say more? The thing is...guys crazy over school girls. Sometimes even adults (left school loooong time) wore uniform arouns like a daily clothes. Guys there lurve it. Turn off...tch! Promoting too short a skirt! Pervert! Pervert! Save the young children from short school skirts! Petition! Petition! ...tch, perverts won.


4. Working haggard looking adults or those studying real hard, work several jobs a day...wearing either normal clothes with least make up or office wear. (Uniform is another pervert thing there...any uniform, just name it. Office wear inclusive).

So yeah...I was in the fourth category - haggard and tired looking. So came this guy in the midst of the oceans of human...like lightning, he shoved a magazine into my arms. He looked embarrasses and said only, "Dozo...onegai." Then he disappeared into the crowd again. I stood there for a while, what, expecting him to reappear and explain himself? No luck so I looked at the magazine he gave me:



It looked like a harmless female magazine. There's only two english words, 'Free Paper'. I went back and flip through that night and saw something funny. It's a magazine teaching girls (or guys since all shit can happen out there) to 'beautify' themselves. There's cosmetics, lingeries, push up bras, lashes et cetera. Half way through the magazines, I see females advertising themselves (price quotation included). Wicked o.O. The final segment were older ladies advertising themself (price quotation included as well). Mega kill. Lol...I joked with Kin Man that these are what I gathered:
1. It's a compliment that the mysterious guy thought I was a Japanese to have passed me a magazine with only two english words.
2. He was concerned that 'this' Japanese girl does not fit into any of  the 'desirable' category (1,2,3) thus took matters into his own hands and gave me a 'beautifying' magazine hoping that I would learn a trick or two.
3. He was also thinking for my job opportunity, that is, after I 'beautify' myself by offering guidelines as to how to get into that line. Pay back my supposed investment on lift up bras and broom-like lashes, huh?
4. He looked into my future financial resources as well by assuring me that even after one aged, she still can get a job in that line.

Lembu suci...can't imagine myself walking around town like a barbie doll. Polis tangkap *shrugged*

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